Vicious Cycle Of Social Fear

lonely

Growing up I found it hard to fit in with others, I never knew the right thing to say, so I didn’t say anything.

I don’t remember what was going on in my mind. I think there was this part of me that just wanted to be me. Not do anything and accept myself being shy.

Then there was the other side of me that wanted to be like all the other children, talking and playing with others.

I wanted to interact but didn’t because I was in the vicious cycle of social fear: I am shy —> I want to play with them —> If I play with them, I’m afraid of what they will say about me —> I don’t want to be rejected —> I will not join them because…—> I am shy.

It took many years of going outside my comfort zone to become the person I am today, and it didn’t happen without a constant battle between the shy me and the real me.

Decide to Step out of the Cycle

The only way you can overcome your fears is to make a conscious decision to step out of the cycle. It is not easy to do this if you have grown into the habit of fear.

Fear will tell you that your not good enough, your not smart enough, who are you to do something different?

When these thoughts arise you must turn them around saying the opposite, I am good enough, I am smart enough, and I believe in my abilities.

When you first start speaking words of faith it might seem like is not making that much difference but as the saying goes, repetition is the mother of skill. When you repeat this over and over, in time your image of yourself will change.

Start Small

I never thought I was smart enough, so I started reading. I was drawn to spiritual and motivational books.

Within weeks I had so much more to talk about with people who helped my confidence and self-worth. It’s not that my personality changed, but I was happier and more relaxed.

I began to discover who I was. A miracle of creation. I found that most of what I feared was in my mind. I found out that I was my own worst enemy.

Would you tell a young child that they are useless, lack intelligence and have no talent? No. Of course not. Why then do we do it to ourselves?

The way you view yourself is very important and can determine your destiny.

Like me, you may not think you’re intelligent enough or know what to say. You may be overweight and don’t think that will ever change. Or maybe your in a job you don’t enjoy but can’t see a way out.

Whatever form fear takes to hold you back, decide today that you’re going to take a small step of faith.

That small step could be as simple as doing out a CV/Resume, or walking 30minutes at lunch or reading a book on a subject that interests you.

A Step of Faith Is Taking Small Step in the Right Direction

Facing fear scares people as they think they have to overcome it all at once, but it doesn’t work that way.

Overcoming fear is about taking small steps of faith. Each step is taking you closer and closer to a life without fear.

Take a small step towards your destiny today, and tomorrow, and the next day. And watch the big change it will make.

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