Tag: change

11 Things To Know Before Letting Go

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Let-it-go

Letting go has nothing to do with weakness, and everything to do with strength.

We let go when we finally realise our worth, when we finally realise that our mental health is more important. That said, I know that letting go of certain situations can be extremely difficult. So, i would like to share 11 points to reflect on before you decide if it’s time for you to let go.

1. The past can steal your present if you let it

You can spend days, weeks, months, or even years sitting alone in the darkness, over-analysing a situation from the past, trying to put the pieces together, justifying what could have or should have happened. Or, you can choose to leave the past behind you, and walk into a future full of sunshine and new experiences.

2. Don’t be too hard on yourself

There are enough people that want to pull you down and hold you back without you being one of them. Tell yourself, “I am doing the best I can with what I have at this moment. And that is all I can expect of anyone, including me.” Love yourself and be proud of everything that you do, even your mistakes. Because even mistakes mean you’re trying.

3. You are in control of one person, and one person only: yourself

The fastest way to happiness is to stop worrying about things that are beyond the power of your control. Letting go of control doesn’t mean that you don’t care; it shows that you realise that the only person you can control is yourself.

4. Not everyone, and not everything, is meant to stay

There are things you don’t want to happen, but have to accept, things you don’t want to know, but have to learn, and people you can’t live without but have to let go. Some circumstances and people come into your life to strengthen you so that you can move on without them.

5. Happiness is not the absence of problems, but the ability to deal with them

Imagine all that we could achieve if we could forget the hurts or disappointments of the past! Always look at what you have, instead of what you have lost. Because it’s not what the world takes away from you that counts; it’s what you do with what you have left.

6. What might seem correct to you will be wrong for others, and vice versa

As you will probably know yourself, trying to tell someone they are wrong when they think they are right, doesn’t end well. Save yourself the stress and sleepless nights. Don’t waste your energy; the only way some people learn is from making mistakes.

7. Some people will refuse to accept you for who you are, so don’t try to impress them

When you are comfortable with who you are, not everyone in this world will like you, and that’s okay. You could be the most helpful, compassionate, caring person in the world, and there’s going to be someone out there who doesn’t like you for having them qualities. Just be you, 100%.

8. The world changes when you change

You are today where your thoughts and beliefs have brought you; you will be tomorrow where your thoughts and beliefs take you. If you want to change your life, you must first change your mind. The world around you changes when you change.

9. You can make decisions, or you can make excuses

Life is a continuous exercise in creative problem-solving. A mistake doesn’t become a failure until you refuse to correct it. Thus, most long-term failures are the outcome of people who make excuses instead of decisions.

10. It only takes a few negative remarks to kill your dreams

Don’t let people interrupt you and tell you that you can’t do something. If you have a dream that you’re passionate about, you must protect it. When others can’t do something themselves, they’re going to tell you that you can’t do it either; and that’s a lie. These people are simply speaking from within the boundaries of their limitations.

11. Sometimes walking away is the only way to win

Never waste your time trying to explain yourself to people who refuse to understand you.  Sometimes the best way to win an argument is to walk way. They will never change, it’s you that has too.

The Power Of Letting Go is currently on FREE promotion on Amazon for a limited time. To download simply click on the image above.

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Warning: If you don’t use your God given talent, you could lose it forever.

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Sometimes, I felt like I didn’t have what it takes, but here I am. I inspire and touch 1000s of peoples lives each month.

And you know what?

You are right here beside me. Supporting me, pushing me forward. So, I just want to thank you.

Thank you for reading my words, on my blog or Facebook page. Thank you for downloading my books, and thank you for leaving me the reviews that helped me get my message of faith out into the world.

thank you

Each of us is capable of so much, but we need to go after what we want. If I had of let the negative thoughts win, I would not be in the position I am today.

It reminds me of an ancient story about a master who got his three servants together and said, “I’ve got these talents.” (Now back in those days a talent was a measure of gold.)

So, he said to the three servants, “take these talents and see what you can do with them. I’m taking a journey, and I will be gone for a while. When I come back, we will go over the books and see how you did.”

The master said to the first, “here is five talents for you. Five. Heres two of them for you. Two. And here’s one for you. One. Take those talents. See what you can do with them. When I come back, we’ll get together and go over it all.”

The servants said, “okay.” The master set off.

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When the master came back from his trip, he called for the three servants, and asked, “How did it go with those talents. Your five, what happened?”

That servant said, “Well, I took the five talents you gave me and put them to work. It was a little shaky at first, but things soon got rolling. I worked as hard as I could, and my talents grew to seven, eight, nine, ten. In the end, I double my talents from five to ten. The books will show.”

So the master said, “ Good job.”

Then the master turned to the second servant and said, “ I gave you two talents, what happened?”

That servant said, “about the same thing happened to me. I put the two talents to work. Working hard they grew to four talents. I doubled my talents from two to four. Books will show.”

And again the master said, “Well done.”

one talent

To the last servant, the master said, “ I gave you one talent. What happened?”

That servant said, “Well, I took that one talent you gave me, and I carefully wrapped it, and I dug a hole and buried it, camouflaging it.” I guess so no one would steal it.

He said, “fortunately, nobody got it. I knew you were going to be here today so I dug it up. Here it is, safely wrapped. I did not lose it while you were gone.”

According to the ancient story, the master said, “ take that talent away from him and give it to the man that has ten.”

Now, you might say, “Well, I don’t like that arrangement. The poor guys only got one talent. He’s got ten; it ought to be more even.”

The moral of the story is; what ever you don’t employ you forfeit.

Put another way, whatever you don’t use you lose. Lack of use causes loss.

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If you tie your arm to your body and leave it there long enough, you’ll never use it again. It’s over for the arm. The only way to keep the use of the arm is to keep using it.

When you give up due to lack of faith, fear, doubt, or worry. You lose automatically. If you don’t use the gifts and abilities God has graced you with, they will diminish.

Ambition unused decreases. Strong feelings unused diminish. Faith unused decreases. It will decrease, it’s a law.

Today, I want you to know that you too have been graced with many talents. If you choose to sit back and not use them, then you will live a very unrewarding and frustrating life.

Many people will say, but I don’t know what my talents are. Well, make it your mission to find out.

God given talents are things that you do naturally. Write, talk, paint, provide service, listen, motivate, and educate.

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Often you have done them most of your life. They are never forced, they are straight in front of you, but you fail to see them. We take them for granted because we think they are irrelevant. Looking back over your life with purpose you can easily find them, and I welcome you today to do so.

Now, like a muscle that has not been used for a very long time, it will take rehabilitation until your natural talent flows as freely as it once did but it is worth the effort.

Show your gratitude to your heavenly Father today by using and increasing your talents.

 

Thanks for reading.
Rev J Martin

Gain success love and happiness.

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loved

We are born into this world with two fears; fear of falling and the fear of loud noises. Every other fear has been learnt.

The good news is anything learnt can be unlearnt. What I have found from my own experience is, behind a fear can lie an opportunity for growth.

Recently a young lady asked me for advice, she worked in an office, it was a well-paid job, but she was unhappy and needed a change but did not know what she could do. I have changed her name at her request.

Explaining this principle, that we can sometimes learn more from our fears than staying in our comfort zone. I asked Olivia to think of a fear she had overcome that made her a stronger person

She was very open to the idea if I believed that it would help.

After some thought, Olivia revealed to me that one of her first jobs was in a major high street clothes shop; a weekend job to help her through college. The job mainly involved getting the clothes ready for sale; tagged, priced, etc.

She picked the job because she didn’t feel confident being on the floor dealing with customers, and the thought of working on the tills was something she dreaded.

Then one Friday evening after she finished her shift, management informed her they were very short staffed for Saturday and needed her on tills. Saturday being one of the busiest days of the week, Olivia panicked.

‘Well, I went straight home and curled up in a ball.” She said, “Fear had gripped me; my mind was quickly filled with doubt.”

She went on to tell me that, thoughts like, what if I make a mistake, what if others laugh at me, what if I forget to remove the security tags, tormented her.

The more questions she asked, the bigger the problem became. Within hours Olivia told me she had stomach pains. She couldn’t eat and found it hard to sleep. Even though it was her worse fear, she knew that it was something she had to do.

That Saturday someone shadowed her for most of the day, which helped her greatly. Olivia explained, “I was slow, I was clumsy, I made mistakes, but it was expected of me.”

Olivia was then told she would be on the floor on a more regular basis. Over the next few weeks and months, her confidence grew; although she still did not like being on the floor alone.

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By the time she left college, Olivia was one of the best till operators in the shop. She could greet the customer, talk to the customer, neatly fold everything into the bag, quicker than everyone else.

It got to the point where she was chosen to go on tills when they wanted the queue down quickly while still maintaining excellent customer service.

Then Olivia’s eyes lit up, I could see ideas were dancing in her head.

“I enjoy communicating and helping people face to face. You have been so helpful, thank you,” she said emotionally.

I reminded her that I had done nothing, she had only become aware of a talent that she possessed.

I share this story today to highlight a point. Behind your greatest fear could be your ultimate skill. Maybe like Olivia you have already discovered it but cast it to one side.

Whatever your fear, unless you confront it; you will never know what’s on the other side.

It could be success, love or happiness.

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Beyond your fears is a world you may never know; part of you that you will never know exists, part of you which could offer so much to the world.

Overcoming fear builds confidence and faith; it expands your character allowing you to grow.

Now I’m not trying to fool you that it will be easy. No no no, it will be one of the hardest things that you have ever done in your life.

And, you will make mistakes.

But over time you will get better. The thing that you once feared will actually become enjoyable, so enjoyable that one day you will tell a story that will make you realize how far you have progressed.

How much you have achieved.

You will have the realization that conquering one fear opened the door to a new world, and your life grew at such an alarming rate that the initial fear almost seems ridiculous.

You will also know if you had shied away from it, you would be living such a different life.

My challenge for you today is to face one of your fears. This may seem like a daunting task, so I will make it easy for you.

Pick something small, something you keep putting off. It could be as simple as making a phone call or signing up for a class or course.

Whatever it is, make a decision to confront it today.

Action creates momentum.

Simple changes have a way of leading to significant results.

 

Have a fantastic week
Rev J Martin

The Power Of Faith Can Move Mountains

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Faith is to believe what we want is possible. It is generated by what we hear, by what we see and most of all by what we think and say each day.

If your mind is obsessed with thoughts of insecurity or fear, this is because such thoughts have dominated your thinking over an extended period of time.

These negative thought patterns can make a simple problem seem as big and unmovable as a mountain.

The scripture says, “according to your faith be it unto you.” in other words the bigger your problem becomes, the bigger your faith needs to be.

Faith is not reality, it can not be seen, but it has an incredible effect on your life, your attitude and your emotions. It can even affect the body’s healing process. 

There is truly a magical power found in faith; an unseen magic.

Language, like faith, is also an unseen magic. Words can not be seen when they are transmitted from the speaker to the one that is listening, but they can have a profound effect.

Jesus said in the Gospel of Matthew, “Truly I tell you, if you have faith and do not doubt, not only can you do what was done to the fig tree, but also you can say to this mountain; ‘Go, throw yourself into the sea,’ and it will be done. 

Faith needs to be combined with discipline to see results. You need to learn to hold faith thoughts in your mind; you must read, study, and speak words of faith daily. 

Wisdom and faith when mixed with action create reality. The reality of a career, the reality of health, the reality of happiness, and peace of mind.

Faith is something that needs constant attention or thoughts of doubt will set in.

If you get up each morning and declare that it will be a fantastic day, and approach the world with that view; it will be a fantastic day. Start the day with words of faith; sow seeds of faith into your life. 

Most people do the exact opposite; they wake up in the morning and turn on the news; starting their day with war, death and sorrow.

Starting the day with fear effects your spirit. You will become stressed quicker as your defences will be low.

It has been said that thoughts are things; they actually process dynamic power. Well, I have seen over and over again how people think themselves into and out of situations. I have seen people make themselves ill with their thoughts and by the same token, I have witnessed people make themselves healthy again when they change their core beliefs.

One of the best cures of self-doubt is the thought that Almighty God is with you and helping you. That He will stand by you and see you through the hard times.

To practice this belief simply affirm; God is with me, God is helping me, God is guiding me.

Spend time each day visualising his presence believing this affirmation. Go through each day with the knowing that what you have affirmed and visualised is true.

The release of power into your life that this practice stimulates will amaze you. The mountains in your life will soon be removed.

When you learn to nurture yourself with faith, you will begin to see your life change in unusual ways.

My new book, The Power Of Faith Can Move Mountains is free now on Amazon. Link Below. Download and enjoy.

Thanks for reading.
Rev J Martin 

 

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Power Of Words

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YES I CAN

Words have a great impact on your world. They inform you, educate you and have the power to make you buy one product over the next.

What if you could harness this power.

I have already written a short book on the subject but would like to expand on the topic today as over the last week it has come to my attention that we all need a reminder from time to time.

I know a man that says, I always seem to miss the bus, or it is pulling away as I arrive. His daughter, on the other hand, says, I always seem to arrive just before the bus comes or when it is pulling into the station.

Each of them has made a separate law for themselves. One for success and one for failure.

This is a simple example that may lead to missing a plane from time to time, but often people through their words create many limiting laws for themselves, restricting what they can achieve in life.

I never remember.

I can’t learn anything new.

I don’t have the time to read.

I haven’t got enough education to do that.

If you say any of these things or anything similar you are not alone. It is estimated that by the time a child is 18 years old, it has been told that they can’t or don’t do that, 147000 times.

It is not surprising then as adults we take a negative view on life; avoiding trying anything new. The good news is you can change it all today by harnessing the power of your words.

When faced with a new task or challenge; turn I never, I can’t; I don’t, I haven’t, too – I always, I can, I will, I have.

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Do not be fooled my the simplicity of changing these words. Simple changes like this in your language can have a massive impact on your life and those around you.

Now changing language is only the first step, you must then put in the ground work of speaking these words of faith regularly; it will change your outlook, which in turn will change your life.

First Steps

This week, make a conscious effort to monitor whenever you say something negative about yourself or towards another; at the end of the week, you will have a list of the words or phrases that may be limiting your life or damaging your relationships.

The next step is to speak the opposite purposely. Example: I will never learn this, too, With practice, I will learn this

Many things we say have almost become a habit, they just roll off the tongue without thought. To break any habit at first may be hard but the fruits of your efforts will be very rewarding.

If you have the habit of saying, I haven’t got the time, make the time. As you would not miss a doctor’s appointment, set an appointment for yourself – to visit an old friend, to read a book or attend the gym.

James 3:2
If anyone can control his tongue, it proves that he has perfect control over himself in every other way.

Thanks for reading, enjoy your Sunday and week ahead.

Rev J Martin

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Eliminate Your Fear And Live the Life You Want

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Recently I seen a movie called, Joe and the Volcano. It starred Tom Hanks very early in his career. For those of you that have not seen the film, Tom plays the character, Joe.

Joe does not enjoy his life; he does the same old thing every day in a dead end job; he is miserable, and sees no way out. He had lost all faith in himself and life.

Joe knew he was capable of doing more, but he had given up on himself. We can all identify with this in some way. As he was miserable with his life, he was constantly sick with different ailments he would create for himself to get out of work.

One day he took the morning off to go for an appointment; the doctor seeing the pattern thought he would trick Joe. So he told him he was suffering from a new illness called a brain cloud and had only six months to live.

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Joe believed the doctor.

It worked out that there was a reason the doctor told him this, on a nearby island there was a volcano which was going to erupt soon, but if someone jumped into the volcano and sacrificed their life; all would be ok.

Joe, believing that he only had six months to live was easily convinced that he was the man to save the island.

He was given unlimited credit cards and told to enjoy himself first then he would have to sacrifice himself to the volcano. He was told to live like a king, and die like a man.

Joe’s life now had a purpose; he wanted to do it.

When people have no meaning or purpose to their lives, they will throw themselves into anything. Drink, drugs; a job that doesn’t add any value to their life; a relationship that they know is bad but they stay there anyway because they don’t value themselves enough to walk away.

Well, when the doctor told Joe that he was going to die from this brain cloud, Joe decided to live his life; all fear left him, he didn’t care anymore.

relaxin on beach

It got me thinking about my own life; did I have to be told that I was going to die to do all the things that I wanted to? It’s so easy to put things off, to say, l will visit my friends abroad next year.

We can so easily take life for granted, not realizing that each day is a gift that we must treasure.

When Joe was told, he was going to die his whole world transformed. He went straight from the doctors to work and quit. Then on the way out, he asked the girl that he had fancied for years out for dinner. He wasn’t worried about rejection or what people might say.

When Joe eventually jumped into the volcano with the girl that he fell in love with, he was thrown back out.

For me, the volcano was a symbol of fear. When Joe jumped into his fear, there was nothing there. That’s the way fear is; it looks big, but when you have the courage to turn and face it you will realize that there is nothing much to it.

Joe went from working a dead end job to travelling the world on a magical quest, simply because the fear was removed from his life when he found he had a short time to live.

If you had six months to live what would you do differently?

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Would you stay in the same job? Would you be worried about the things that you are worried about right now? Would you have the same people in your life?

This film reminded me of a book my friend lend me a couple of years ago, in that book it asked, what would you do if you had three months to live?

My answer was, I would love to write down my thoughts and inspire and motivate others.

On the next page, I got a shock, it said, you could die today, so whatever you wrote on the last page start spending as much time doing that today. So I did.

So what would you do? Well, whatever it may be, decide from today you are going to delegate your life to it.

The main reason Joe stayed in the same job as long as he did, he feared change, most people fear change. A lot of people stay in jobs that make them miserable or relationships that make them unhappy.

Sometimes to see the beauty of life, you have to be willing to change; change cities, change jobs, change relationships, change friends.

We were created to bring so much to life, not to do a job that has no meaning for us for 40 years. God created you to achieve great things, to bring love happiness and joy into the world.

If your life is not the way you want it to be; if you are not living the way that you want to live; if you are not experiencing what you want to experience, you have to ask yourself why?

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In the film when Joe quits his job he says to his boss, I sold my soul to you for $300 a week. He is not alone. Many people work jobs where it’s no longer healthy for them to be there, but because they don’t have faith in themselves and their abilities, they stay there.

They remain there as victims, volunteer victims, because no one is making them do it, they volunteer. They willingly do it.

They volunteer to hide in fear; they volunteer to believe that God gave others unlimited resources, and not them.

Our Heavenly Father asks one thing of us; that we have faith.

Having faith means to go for what you want in life. My grandmother used to say, do what makes you happy, if it means living under an old cart. The older and wiser I get the more I understand the wisdom in those words.

One day of happiness is like 1000 days in misery.

John 8:32
Then you will know the truth, and the truth will set you free.

The thing about the truth is; people don’t want to hear the truth. People don’t want to hear that if they are not happy, they must change. People don’t want that sense of responsibility.

Don’t be held back in fear, rise up in faith and begin to live the life that you have always wanted to live.

I love to fly, but I also know that some of them planes are coming down quicker than they are going up. It’s dangerous for that plane to fly. You see some ships leave the harbour and sink; it’s dangerous for the ship to be on the ocean. You read about people leasing their homes, and the people that rent the house tear it up; it’s dangerous to let somebody move into your home.

Yet, the engineers will tell you that it is more dangerous for them planes to stay on the ground, that it will rust out faster than it will up in the heavens.

They say that ships will collect more barnacles in the harbour and become unseaworthy faster than they will sailing the high seas, and they say that if that house stays empty, it will deteriorate faster than if you have someone living there.

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Just like a plane was built for flying, and a ship was built for sailing, and houses were built for living in; we too were created for a purpose. We were built for accomplishment; we were engineered for success, we have been graced with the seeds of greatness that we must share with others to see the fruits of life.

The greatest danger we have as human beings is doing nothing at all.

Stop 100 young people on the street and ask them if they are happy at their work, only 5% will say they are. Follow these people until they are 65 and of those that are still living, studies have shown that only 5% will be happy with their lives.

Let today be the day that you decide to be part of that 5%.

Let today be the day that you start to plan your future, start to use the gifts and talents that God has graced you with. Do something that you have always wanted to do but have been putting off.

I wish you, your family and friends happiness health and love.

Thank you for your time.
Rev J Martin

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Free eBook to rekindle Faith

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Firstly I would like to thank you for following me, I truly appreciate your time, and I want you to know I pray for you each day.

I firmly believe that we all have been given a divine destiny; a special gift that is unique to us. Happiness and fulfilment come when we use that gift to help others; which results in making this world a better place.

Too often we step back in fear, with the attitude that we are not worthy of the new relationship, the new job, the new career. I would like you to know that you are worthy; you have a light within you that you must allow to shine into the world.

If you feel held back in fear at this present moment, my book Power of Choice – Choose faith not fear can help you rekindle your faith. It is free on Amazon until Thursday 11.59pm.

My main aim as an author is to inspire change in the lives of my readers, one verse, one story, one sentence, can be all it takes to open the door to the next level of your destiny. This is one of my daily prayers.

We all work on our fitness; doing the best that we can to keep healthy. Faith is no different, it needs constant work and maintenance.

When you see someone that never seems to get into difficulty or never seems to be stressed, this is not by chance. This person has very little fear in his or her life.

Enjoy the book; may it bring you happiness.

Link – Power Of Choice – Choose Faith Not Fear

Rev J Martin

More Happiness; Less Stress.

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let-go-stress

I came across a book on gratitude, which has actually changed my life, and I was a very grateful person, to begin with.

We all have problems; they come to us all. Some are physical, others are emotional, and sometimes even spiritual ones arise.

We like to be in control of any change in our lives, but it doesn’t always work out that way; life evolves at an alarming rate. With all the pressure, stress and worry, we can easily get caught up in it, not seeing a way out.

“I would be very grateful if things would just work out the way I want.” Then it works out, and we are thankful for a fleeting moment.

In the book, it made reference to Matthew 13:12. “Whoever has will be given more, and he will have an abundance. Whoever does not have, even what he has will be taken away.”

Many people have said to me, this passage sounds unjust, as it seems to be saying the rich will get richer and the poor will get poorer. For me, Jesus is talking about knowledge of the kingdom of heaven, but gratitude fits very well.

“Whoever has gratitude will be given more, and he will have abundance. Whoever does not have gratitude, even what he has will be taken away.”

We live in a society of MORE, everyone wants MORE, they want to lose more weight, they want more holidays, they want more money, then they will be happy. In their search for more, they are missing a vital ingredient – Gratitude.

The art of being grateful for what we already have.

When you are grateful for your job, even if it’s not perfect, your view on it will change, meaning you will enjoy it more.

When you are grateful for the relationships in your life, even if some of them are not perfect, you will begin to look at the positive aspects of them, and the appreciation for them will grow.

When you are grateful for the money you have, no matter how little, you will find, this simple change of focus makes a huge difference in how rich you feel.

The flipside is when you are not grateful, you will find that you will only look at the negative things in your job, in your relationships, you will complain about the lack of money, meaning you will not even get the enjoyment out of the little you have.

size-changing-plant-pot

What You Focus On Grows.

It was recommended to write down 10 things each morning that you were grateful for. I thought to myself after a few days this is going to be difficult, but what I found was, during the day new ideas kept popping into my head. It became clear to me, very quickly, there was so much in my life to be grateful for.

My list started with the Internet because it is the reason I am connecting to you today. My family for giving me a solid foundation of faith. My senses so I can experience the world in all its glory. It actually alarmed me the number of things that I took for granted.

If you mentioned being thankful for your sight to anyone that has sight they would not really appreciate what you mean. Take it away from them for even an hour, and their life would come to a stand still.

Throughout the week my list started to include the simple pleasures of life, coffee, food, clothes, nature. Then I began to realise the number of people that contributed to provide service to me throughout the week. Thousands of farmers, manufacturers, packers, delivery drivers. All essential people to my survival, but all of which, until recently – I took for granted.

Happy Person That I Am

The more I was grateful, the happier I became. There was so much in my life that I took for granted; I simply did not realise how rich and successful I really was. I have absolutely no excuse to complain about anything. In today’s high standard of living, I haven’t got much, but I am still richer than half the people on this planet.

Some people might say, all this grateful stuff is not going to make my life any better, so what if I can walk, so what if I can talk, feel, hear, see, everyone can do these things? What am I gaining by being thankful for what I already have, it seems pointless?

You will find that these same people are not entirely happy; they will constantly be depressed and stressed. No matter how much money they have, they will still have a void in their life. They will spend all the money they have, maybe even more than they have, with the illusion that MORE will fill the void, but they will still be unhappy stressed and depressed. They will still say that gratitude is a waste of time.

When you think, I don’t like my job, I’m not happy in my relationship, I haven’t got enough money, my life’s a mess, I cant pay my bills, no one appreciates me, I haven’t got enough time, then you attract more of these experiences.

Learn to turn it around to:

I’m grateful for my job. I’m grateful for the relationships that make me happy; I’m thankful for the money I have, I’m grateful for my life. I’m grateful that I am able to use service’s before I need to pay for them. I’m thankful for the people that do appreciate me.

True happiness and fulfilment come from being thankful for what you already have. When you are grateful, even the smallest increase in any of these things feels like a gift.

Much of what we take for granted living in the west, people in other parts of the world dream about.

True riches come from gratitude. Try it just for today, and you will see the difference that it makes.

Have a good weekend.

Rev J Martin

 

How to Win Friends and Influence People.

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Many people down through the years have recommended that I read a book called, ‘How to win friends and influence people’.

The title never really appealed to me.

Recently, I received a voucher for a bookstore, which happened to be doing a promotion on the book, so I bought it. As it turned out; it was not what I expected at all. As the saying goes, don’t judge a book by its cover.

The first thing I found very surprising was the fact that it was written in 1937. Secondly, that it contained some principles that were just as relevant in human relations.  One chapter stood out above all others, which I will focus on today.

The chapter was called, ‘If you want to gather honey, don’t kick over the beehive.’ It talked about the fact you should never criticise someone, as you never know what they have
been through.

The author used many stories to demonstrate this point, but the ones that had the deepest impact on me involved Abraham Lincoln.

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When Mrs Lincoln and others spoke harshly about southern people. Lincoln replied, “Don’t criticise them, they are just what we would be under similar circumstances.

A very inspirational view.

Another example.

During the American civil war in fighting the Battle of Gettysburg. The enemy got cornered by a swollen river. They were trapped, surrounded on all sides.

Hearing this, Lincoln telegraphed his orders to his General, ‘Attack immediately,’ and not wait to have a council of war.

What did the General do?

He did the exact opposite of what he was told. He hesitated. He procrastinated. He called a council of war. He refused point blank to attack. Within a week, the waters receded, and the enemy escaped.

Lincoln was furious. They had the enemy at their weakest point. The war could have been over in a matter of days, but the general called up all his troops for a meeting.

In bitter disappointment at his general, Lincoln sat down and wrote a letter, and at this time a letter coming from Lincoln was the severest rebuke.

What do you think the general did when he read the letter?

The general never seen the letter. Lincoln never mailed it. It was found among his papers when he died.

It was said, that Lincoln never mailed the letter because he saw it from the Generals perspective. If he had seen as much blood, if he had listened to the screams and shrieks of the wounded and dying for weeks; maybe he would not have been so anxious to attack.

Rather than criticise, he put himself in the general’s boots.

It reminded me of how quickly we often jump to a conclusion and judge or criticise without much thought where the other person is coming from.

How To Apply

When we find ourselves annoyed of upset at what someone said or done, it is important to rather than take offence to take a step back and look at the situation.

This is easier said than done.

This requires a strength of character as it is human nature to defend what we think is correct. It’s in these moments that our faith is tested.

Do we show love and understanding, or not. It’s in your moments of decision that your destiny is shaped. Be shaped by Love.

Enjoy your weekend.
Rev J Martin

Is being Happy & Stress-free worth feeling uncomfortable for a short time.

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Do you find yourself, avoiding new situations because they make you uncomfortable?

It’s normal to feel uncertain before you face a new challenge, but stepping outside our comfort zone is the only time we grow.

Why would you want to do something uncomfortable?

We go out of our way to get away from stress and doing anything that makes us feel uncomfortable, but there is a difference between the discomfort of trying something new and stressful feelings.

At one time you were afraid to drive. Now you enjoy it. You may not have liked eating vegetables when you were younger, but now you couldn’t live without them. You were once afraid of applying for that first big job, but now that you have a career you enjoy, you wouldn’t trade the experience for anything. We all do things that at one time we were afraid to do.

Good things in life come to those who take risks, those who step outside their comfort zones in the knowing that with God anything is possible.

Matthew 9:29
Then he touched their eyes and said, “According to your faith let it be done to you.”

Faith is stepping out into the unknown with the knowing that all will be ok. Successful people in all walks of life, take risks. They feel fear, but they do not let it push them back. Their faith in succeeding drive’s them forward

If you avoid new experiences, you are missing out on the best that life has to offer. The longer that you wait, procrastinate, or cower in fear, the more “comfortable” you get with how things are, and that’s not a very good place to be.

Before we go any further, ask yourself if you are happy?

Are you happy in your current state or do you ever dream of doing something else, something more?

Do you think about reaching out to other people, starting a new hobby, eating healthier, or even going for a new job?

If the answer is yes, then you have already decided this is something you want to do. Now it’s just a matter of making up your mind to overcome your fears.

Once people get settled into a routine, it can be difficult to break. Most people are running on a sort of “autopilot,” it takes them from point A to point B with little to no thought, but this is not what God created you for.

When we are young – we are fearless. Young children will pull an iron off the iron-board on top of themselves because they want to know where the lead is coming from.

We are told repeatedly growing up, don’t do this, don’t do that, so we stop exploring life. It gets to a point where we are afraid to try anything new; we get into a routine; we enter the comfort zone.

It takes no thought to stay in a comfort zone, for this reason, many people take up permanent residency.

Getting out of a comfort zone starts with deciding to take action.

Decide that it’s time to do something new. Decide to do something you have been afraid to do in the past. Take up a new hobby. Visit a new place — Decide to break the routine.

“But I’m Scared!”

You are not alone, many people are afraid to take that first step and take action. The idea of making a significant change may even lead to feelings of deep anxiety and self-doubt.

The first step to overcoming the fear of the unknown is to learn to take baby steps. If you fear to look for a new job. Start with writing out a C.V. /Resume. If you would love to lose weight but can’t find the time to go to a gym. Park 10 minutes from work – over a week that is nearly two hours of walking.

Some Helpful Advice

Two things that will help you get started are a list of goals (including those that make you uncomfortable or scare you) and a reliable buddy system.

Write the list of targets that you want to accomplish first. Things that you have always wanted to do but have been afraid to attempt.

Next, enlist the aid of a friend to help you accomplish those goals. Naturally, it’s easy to give up when you are the only one trying. A friend can provide that emotional support you need.

To conquer your fears once and for all and start living the life you dream of; take decisive action. Make up your mind that you can do anything, that you will be successful in whatever you decide to do.

What’s the worst that can happen?

Typically it won’t be as bad as you think. Doing things that make you feel uncomfortable or scared, eventually get easier to do. You may even wonder why you were so afraid in the first place.

Realise your true potential by stretching yourself. God created you to achieve great things. Don’t let fear hold you back.

Enjoy your week.
Rev J Martin

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