Tag: better relationships

A Creative Way to Overcome Relationship Problems

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Once there was a couple, Anna and Ben, who had been married for ten years. They loved each other deeply, but like all couples, they had their share of problems. One of the biggest issues that they faced was that they had different ideas about how to spend their time and money.

Anna was a free spirit who loved to travel and try new things. She was always seeking new adventures and experiences. Ben, on the other hand, was more of a homebody. He enjoyed the comfort and security of their cozy home and preferred to save their money for a rainy day.

As a result, Anna and Ben often found themselves in disagreement about how to spend their time and resources. Anna would get frustrated because she felt like Ben was holding her back from experiencing new things, and Ben would get annoyed because he felt like Anna was too impulsive and reckless.

One day, they decided to try and find a way to resolve their differences. They knew that if they didn’t find a solution, their relationship would suffer.

First, they tried compromising by splitting their time and money equally between their respective interests. However, this approach only led to resentment, as both Anna and Ben felt like they were sacrificing their own desires for the sake of the other.

Next, they tried taking turns choosing how to spend their time and money. This approach worked a little better, as they were both able to experience some of their preferred activities. However, they still found themselves getting frustrated when it wasn’t their turn to make the decisions.

Finally, they hit upon a creative solution. They decided to create a “wish jar” where they could write down their hopes and dreams for the future. This way, they could see each other’s aspirations and find ways to support and encourage each other.

For example, Anna wrote down that she wanted to go on a safari in Africa, and Ben wrote down that he wanted to learn how to play the guitar. They then worked together to find ways to make their respective wishes a reality.

Anna and Ben found that by focusing on their shared goals and supporting each other’s dreams, they were able to overcome their differences and find a deeper sense of connection. They learned that by being open and honest about their desires, they could find ways to grow and evolve as a couple.

As they worked towards their shared goals, Anna and Ben found that they were able to spend their time and money in a way that was meaningful and fulfilling for both of them. They learned that by being flexible and open-minded, they could find creative solutions to their problems and build a stronger, more loving relationship.

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The Secret to Less Anxiety Revealed!

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anxiety

Anxiety is something that affects us all.

For some, however, rather than make them hide away looking for safety, they use their anxious feelings to propel them forward, to walk in and give there best interview, presentation, etc.

So to the secret.

Is there one to limit the anxiety that we may feel?

Well, many years ago, I had to work on a project that involved me working with over 150 people. My anxiety levels went through the roof. I wanted to fit in, I wanted my voice to be heard, and connect with as many people as possible, but it wasn’t to be.

I only made a few friends, and even with those people, I couldn’t be fully myself, I had to talk about the project or the subjects that interested them.

It’s only when I left that project and started to work on my own again meeting people one to one, on my own terms did I realise that my personality just didn’t fit with dealing with a lot of people.

lesson

The lesson that I learnt was that to have peace and happiness; we have to be true to how you are.

If you feel that you’re at your best when surrounded by a lot of people but sad if you are alone then make sure you are not alone that often, or get an activity that occupies your mind when you are alone.

If you’re like me, feeling at your best when you are alone, then get a job that allows you to work alone.

We can easily avoid a lot of our anxieties by just accepting the way we are. Problems usually arise when we try to be something we’re not.

All your friends could be sociable people, but crowds may make you feel uncomfortable, then if you mention this, you may be made fun off as if you’re not normal or you need to be more confident.

Yes, in some cases this is correct, but if the people that surround you don’t have the same interests or moral standards, it can be a horrible experience.

spiritual

I have always been interested in the spiritual, and metaphysical, not party-friendly subjects.

Some people love to gossip and have small talk. I’m just not one of those people, meaning I found it very difficult growing up.

For most of my life, I thought that there was something wrong with me, I found it hard to hold conversations because I couldn’t be myself. Conversations with me were serious conversations, people you will find don’t like serious, they want easy, gossip, scandal, or about the latest drama on tv. And there is nothing wrong with that. But I couldn’t do it.

It wasn’t until I removed myself from the environments where materialistic people surrounded me, did my anxiety go away.

The relief I got from no longer having to be something that I was not, I can not describe in words.

Do you feel trapped?

relation

Maybe at the moment, you’re in an unhappy relationship because you just go along with the other person. After all, their happiness means more to you than your own happiness. And that is lovely that you love them that much.

But you’re not true to yourself.

If the moment that you stand your ground and make your voice heard you are shot down, or an argument commences then this is an unhealthy relationship.

One in which will not work long term, and if it does it means that you will have sacrificed your happiness for the other person’s happiness.

True love is when both people make sacrifices.

This is just one example.

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Another could be that you’re in friendship and your friend or friends love getting very drunk at the weekend spending all their money, you on the other hand like to have a good time but want to save a little money. Not live week to week, spending most of your weekend recovering in bed feeling unwell.

Peer pressure can lead to a lot of anxiety, you can easily follow other people down a road that you don’t feel comfortable, and the longer you follow them, the harder it becomes to walk your own path.

Happiness is the product of living life the way that you want to, not caring what others think.

These are just two examples, but the list goes on. There are so many areas of our lives that we do certain things to fit in, to be liked.

Yes, we all want to be accepted, but if being accepted means that you compromise who you are. Is that what you want?

In my experience anxiety builds up in your life until the point that it overpowers you. You then think that you’re an anxious person, that it will not go away…

This is not the case

Please take a look at your life, look at all the situations or people that make you feel anxious and make some changes. It could be to change jobs; it could be to limit the time you spend with certain people to see if it helps.

It could even be to spend less time on social media or turn off notifications if seeing constant updates of the people you know having a good time makes you feel sad and lonely.

See how your life improves.

Growing up, I gave my power away to others, thinking I was the person with the problem when, in fact, I was just a spiritual person that was surrounded by people that were more material focused. I was no better, just different.

What I looked at as a weakness was a strength.

To lower your anxiety, be honest with yourself, are you living life to impress and make others happy?

Are you surrounded by people in your work and social life that don’t have the same interests as you? Where you have to put on an act to fit in?

If the answer to any of the questions was YES, then start to make some changes, and you will notice how your anxiety level subsides.

Thanks for reading.

7 Wonderful Things that You Gain When You Let Go and Let God Take Control

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let god take control

When you try to control too much, life becomes much harder to enjoy.  Sometimes you just need to let go and let God take control. Relax, take a deep breath and be grateful for what you have.

Last week I met up with an old friend, someone whom I care about deeply. Someone I worry about constantly, as they take no care of their health. Over the years I have watched them turn from someone that could run a half marathon to someone that is out of breath walking up a few flights of stairs.

All I want is for them to eat healthier and take some exercise to give them a better quality of life but sadly that’s not reality.

When I reflected on the situation I realise that there is nothing I can do. Because I’m not in control of anyone but myself. I want to help my friend, but they’re not interested in being helped.

So I made a decision, to let go. to surrender.

Not “let go” as in “let them go.”  I “let go” as in I stopped trying to control them, I’ve stopped trying to change them. What is the point of me getting stressed and worried if they are not willing to change.

And this, I’ve learned, is the best way to be in all walks of life…

When you let go of control, you stop trying to change people, and just dissolve into their presence, just noticing who they really are, just appreciating them, faults and all.

When you let go of control you will notice just how much time you spend trying to control. Not just people, but the events in your life.

Don’t get me wrong, you will still get stressed and worry, but you will notice that you snap out of it sooner. So instead of being stressed, for example, for the rest of the day, or week. Your only stressed for a short time.

You’ll start to notice just how much pressure you put on yourself by trying to have everything work out exactly as you would like.

When you let go of control and let God take control here’s what you gain…

1. You fall in love with people for who they really are

It’s OK to disagree with the thoughts or opinions expressed by those you love, but you must accept their opinion. Learn to appreciate different perspectives, lifestyles, and opinions, even if it means overcoming your pride and opening your mind beyond what’s comfortable.

Love is about letting those we care about be 100% themselves, and not distorting them to fit our own ideas of who we think they should be.

2. You grow beyond everyone’s judgements

How often have you been judged?  How often has the direction of your life been shaped by such judgements? Think about it.

How many opportunities have you been denied — or, for that matter, been granted — because someone failed to understand you completely? And how often have  you let other peoples judgements make you upset or stress you out because you thought you could control the way everyone sees you?

The truth is, people will see what they want to see whether you worry about it or not.

It’s time to let go of trying to control how everyone perceives you.

It’s time to let God take control, and just do the best you can.

3. You get to enjoy the peace that’s already within you

Realize that, somewhere within you, there exists a spirit that is eternally at peace. Because inner peace does not depend on external conditions — it’s what remains when you surrender the need to control.

The need for something to be different is nothing more than worry and worries like this only lead us in circles.

Peace of mind arrives the moment you come to peace with what’s on your mind, and this happens when you let go of the need for things to be different than they are. What’s happened has happened, and no amount of complaining or worry is going to change that fact.

4. You learn more about how life really works.

When you attempt to control the uncontrollable you create resistance.  You resist how everything works rather than learning about it.  So here’s a simple challenge for you:  Instead of trying to make things work exactly the way you want them to work, just watch them work today.

You’ll learn much more about human nature and the inner workings of the world.

As you see things working without you controlling them, the way you see what you see will gradually change.  Because YOU will gradually change.  You will begin to understand that things are a little different than you wanted them to be.  And that’s perfectly OK.

5. You experience more of life’s pleasant surprises.

Would you really want to be in control of everything, and know your future every step of the way?

If you’re thinking, “yes,” think again.  Not knowing is one of life’s greatest gifts.

Life is so full of changeable beauty and magnificent surprises.  And sometimes the unexpected arrival of this beauty is almost too much to handle.

Do you know that feeling?  When you get a breakthrough or some good news that gives you the lift you need to restore your faith…

Do you really want to miss out on them moments for the rest of your life?

6. You free your mind from needless worries.

The world around you is going to spin one way or the other.  So why not allow God to bless you in surprising and joyful ways?

Think about it…

What if, instead of pushing so hard to make life happen every second, you decided to let go a little and allow life to happen to you sometimes?

What if, instead of trying to be in constant control, you simply surrendered control to something bigger than yourself?

What if, instead of working so hard to figure out every last answer, you allowed yourself to be guided to the solution in perfect timing?

And what if, there was no solution needed at all?

7. You get more of what you want, by doing less.

When you let go and let God take control instead of trying to tightly control everything, you will be happier and have more peace.

You will notice that things will take care of themselves.  You will have less stress, less worry, and more time and energy to work on the things that matter — the things you actually can control — like your attitude about everything.

Let God Take Control

The mind is the place where the greatest conflict resides.

It’s where… half of the things you thought were going to happen, never did.

It’s where… your expectations always get the best of you.

It’s where… you fall victim to your cravings to control the uncontrollable.

And if you allow those thoughts and cravings to dwell in your mind, they will succeed in robbing you of peace, joy, and ultimately your life.  You will think yourself into a nervous breakdown, into depression, and into defeat.

Truthfully, there’s so much about life that you can’t control, it makes no sense to waste your energy on these things and then neglect everything you can control.

You can decide how you spend your time, whom you socialize with, whom you share your life, money and energy with.  You can choose to love and appreciate the people in your life for exactly who they are.

You can choose how you’re going to respond to surprises and disappointments when they arise, and whether you will see them as curses or opportunities for emotional growth…

And most importantly, you can choose to let go of control and adjust your attitude in an instant, which dictates pretty much everything else.

Thanks for reading.

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Prayer Of The Day – Letting Go Of Past Offenses

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Dear Lord,

I realize that sometimes it is very difficult to let go of the past.  I remember the things people have done that hurt me or offended me in someway, and when I see that behavior happening again it is hard not to revert back to the other times it happened.

But I know that if we already resolved those past offenses, it is only right that I truly let them go.

Please help me to move on and to not hold those offenses against others anymore.  Clear my mind of them and heal my wounds in Jesus name AMEN!

Do You Feel Like You Have Lost Your Way? Then Learn to Connect With The Source Again Today

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connect

Life can get difficult sometimes, and it is hard to put a finger on why? You do the best you can, but nothing seems to work out.

You regret some decisions you have made. You feel guilty about past mistakes, and doubt sets in about your future. These thoughts can change to feelings that your life is out of your control. As negativity fills your mind, you can become stressed, and depressed; which eventually can lead to ill health.

If you could step back for just a moment, you would quickly realise, by placing your attention on your problems, you have stopped God’s healing energy from flowing into your life.

No matter how strong your faith negativity can take its toll, draining your spirit, making you doubt yourself. Your character can change and before long you’re not the person you once were.

Even the best of us can lose our way from time to time.

Faith is like a muscle, it needs to be worked regularly or it loses its power. Simply taking the time to connect to spirit can work wonders. A few words are all it takes to relight the flame of faith.

For the next few days my book, Making Space for God is available for free download. It has the power to realign you and help you see stressful or worrisome situations from a different angle. Click on the image below.

Wishing you health and happiness. Enjoy your weekend.

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7 Beliefs You Must Have To Live A GREAT LIFE

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prueba

Most people drift through life with no sense of purpose, no direction or true joy.

They pay no attention to the fact they are not happy, and never address the mindset and choices that led to that unhappiness, but if they did they might be able to reverse it.

Most people have limiting beliefs, and so their life is limited. They believe life is hard. They believe life is a challenge, full of sadness and misery.

They believe at some level, consciously or subconsciously. The best days are behind them. They believe fitting in, and wearing masks will get them a better or more comfortable life, then being the true self and following their true passions.

Their happiness is dependent on what happens; they are not in control of life; life is in control of them.

If you can switch your beliefs about life to the following seven empowering beliefs, life will start to work for you. The blessings will appear.

The joy that is inside you will start rising out. Here are seven beliefs you must have to live a great life.

Number One: I Decide How I feel No Matter the Circumstances

Number Two: I Have So Much to Be Thankful For

Number Three: Being Myself Attracts the Right People

Number Four: I am Capable of Anything

Number Five: Kindness Always Wins

Number Six: Everything is a Blessing or a Lesson

Number Seven: My Best Is Yet to Come

 

Let me go over each one to help you understand them a little more.

Number One— I Decide How I Feel No Matter the Circumstances.

Have you ever noticed how unhappy people seem to get upset over just about anything? Did you also notice that they seem to have a lot to be unhappy about?

The truth is they let every little circumstance make them unhappy.

Someone cuts them off in traffic… ruins their day. Someone says something unkind, and they replay in their mind for weeks. When you adopt the belief that you are in control of how you feel ,and you commit to doing daily work on yourself, two things happen.

First is that you become empowered. You know nothing has the power to make you unhappy. Only your thoughts can do that. You decide what every event means, and you can choose to see the blessing in everything.

The second is you start to attract better circumstances. When you are putting out better energy, better is attracted to you, and you notice more of the magic all around you.

Know that you decide how you feel and commit to do that daily work on yourself, so you can start and live every day in a beautiful state.

thank you

Number Two— I have So Much to Be Thankful For

This is pretty easy for anyone to understand, happy people are happy because they are because they appreciate more than unhappy people. It has been said many times; you can be happy with little or miserable with much.

Knowing this, you understand the goal is never to accumulate wealth or material things; it is to get to the place where are you feel like you have everything.

Because that is all it is, a feeling. Feel blessed, and you’ll be blessed. Feel blessed, and you are blessed.

Number Three— Being Myself Attracts the Right People

One of the greatest tragedies of human beings is that the majority change who they are to fit into the world. They believe but it being like someone else, will make them fit in better with others, be liked by others. But the truth is, you’re never attracting the right people by being someone you are not.,

Be yourself, and the right people for you will show up. The right people will love the real you.

Ralph Waldo Emerson once said: “to be yourself in a world that is constantly trying to make you something else is the greatest accomplishment.”

Have the courage to be you. Always.

Believe and know if you do so, the perfect people and circumstances will show up in your life!

believe in yourself

Number Four— I Am Capable of Anything

Successful people, know with absolute certainty anything they believe can be their reality. Imagine what you could create in your life with the belief I am capable of anything.

Well, you are, so believe it, know it and apply it to something you want. That dream you have. Plan for it. Work for it and get it!

That change you’ve been putting off: Believe you can do it and go for it!

Number Five— Kindness Always Wins

Some people believe kindness is a weakness. They believe kind people get walked over. They’ll point to an example from years ago, where they gave their heart and soul and that one person trampled all over it, so they adopt the belief that this is what happens every time they are kind.

If someone tripped you over once while you were walking you wouldn’t let that person stop you from walking, would you?

It’s not the walking that made you trip over it was the unkind person. In life, yes, some people will do you wrong, but that doesn’t mean you throw everyone into the same basket.

You are kind because that’s who you are not because you want something out of it, like a transaction.

Who do you think kind people are attracted to? Other kind people or those who refuse to be kind because they were hurt by someone else long ago?

Who do you think amazing people love to be around: those who are kind and genuine or those who are closed off?

Treat others how you want to be treated. Not because you want something from them, but because you know the world is a little better every time someone like you does good, no matter how small.

Number Six— Everything is a Blessing or a lesson

We’ve all been through hard times, every one of us. Some people who have been through minor hard times believe that their life is far less because of the event.

Are those that have been through hell, believe at some level, it was sent as either a lesson or a blessing.

Think of the survivors of diseases or abuse, they go through the worst kinds of pain, but because of the pain, the rise out of it with a new passion for life, they arise out of it with a sense of purpose wanting to help others who are going through the same pain.

You can learn from your past. You can use it. Believe it was sent to make you stronger, better, and more compassionate. Believe there was a reason for it.

Best-is-Yet-to-Come

Number Seven. My best Is Yet To Come

What would you attempt? What could you achieve if you knew your best is yet to come? Well, guess what.. your best is yet to come.

Your best is yet to come.

Look yourself in the mirror each morning and tell yourself, “my best is yet to come.” My best is yet to come, believe it. Live that belief.

Adopt these seven beliefs and see how your life transforms around you.

Summary
Anyone can achieve a reasonable life. And okay life, an okay job an okay relationship anyone can have this.

If you want a great life, you must commit to leading a great life, to doing things the majority do not want to do.

Commit to thinking like I’m a naughty not like the majority.