Christmas is a happy time but also a sad time for many. It’s about family, and when that family bond has cracks, then it can be hard.
My dad recently passed away, so this Christmas has not been that great. I never mentioned it before; I guess I didn’t want to write it down or speak it aloud.
It was never an easy relationship as my parent split up 20 years ago, another subject I rarely talk about but I have decided that its time to stop holding onto things and release them in 2019.
I hold too many feelings within, if I had a flaw that would be it. I think of others before myself, putting me at the back of the line.
The problem with that is the fact that over time it wears you down until it gets to the point you lose yourself, and once that happens, it’s tough to find yourself again.
My dad was a deeply religious man, but he held a lot of un-forgiveness in his heart. I tried for years to advise him to change and to see things from my perspective, but he never did.
I have no regrets; I stuck with him through thick and thin. No matter how much he hurt me I never walked away.
I saw a man in pain; I saw a man that lost his way, I saw a man that had thrown everything away. I saw first hand what holding onto un-forgiveness’ can do to a person.
I watched my dad’s health erode over the years and in the end, COPD take him from a 14 stone (200 pounds) energetic, vibrant man to a seven stone (100 pounds) skeleton in the matter of a year.
It’s hard for me to write this, but if my words help one person, then they have fulfilled their purpose. Holding negativity on the inside of you for most of your life will kill your spirit, and rob you of your happiness. You can lose family, friends and most importantly, your peace of mind.
When you talk about forgiveness most people look the other way, it’s something that no one wants to face.
But forgive we must if we are to see a brighter tomorrow.
Take a walk outside and close your eyes. Feel the wind cleanse your spirit, making you brand new.
From today only let love flow through your heart, and I promise you peace joy and happiness will enter your life.
Wishing you, family and friends the most amazing year of your life.
“Peace is the result of retraining your mind to process life as it is, rather than as you think it should be.
Our daily lives can be busy, hectic and at times overwhelming. It may feel like the idea of a stress free life is just a hopeless wish. But it doesn’t have to be that way.
Small changes over time can make a big difference. Today I would like to share 11 of my favorite tips for finding more peace and calmness in everyday life.
- Slow down. If you slow down your body you will find that your mind will slow down also. You will start to feel less stressed. Many times people will say, “but I have so much to do?” To them i say, ‘if you get sick things still get done.’
- Ask instead of guessing. Reading minds is impossible. But we still try it and create unnecessary anxiety, and uncertainty for ourselves. So ask and communicate instead. It may be hard at first but it can save you and the people around you so much trouble in the long run.
- Be 10 minutes early. It’s a small habit but it has transformed much of my travel time during the year. From always feeling stress to feeling relaxed and recharged.
- Remember the 5 little words that’ll help you to stay sane: one thing at a time. By keeping those words in mind and letting them guide you through your day. You will find yourself less stressed and more focused. Not only will it bring you more inner peace but it will also help you to get things done quicker and better.
- Find a relaxation technique that works for you. By taking time to myself each day, listening to soothing music or a relaxation cd. Link. I find that it releases tension and recharges me. What works for you? Long walks, music, yoga, meditation or going for a swim? Find out and do that.
- Accept and let go. If there is something negative from the past. Something someone said, or did that replays in your mind. Then accept it and let that feeling and thought in, instead of trying to push it away. When you accept it; that is when it starts to lose power. And while the facts may still be there in your head the negative feelings become a lot less powerful. At this point, let it go and direct your focus to the present moment and something better instead.
- Disconnect over the weekend. Leave your work – and work phone – where it belongs. Disconnect or at least limit your internet activity. Put your smart phone on silent, stop checking every notification. Spending more time with your family, friends, hobby or out in nature.
- Unclutter your world, unclutter your mind. De-clutter your workspace or your room. An uncluttered and ordered space brings clarity and order to the mind. And don’t stop there. De-clutter, simplify and organize your home and life too. Live in a more relaxing environment.
- Don’t make mountains out of molehills. This can create much unnecessary stress. When facing a mountain ask yourself questions like. “Does someone on the planet have it worse than me right now? Will this matter in 5 years?” These questions help you to realize that things may not be that bad.
- Breathe. Breathing is an excellent way to relax your mind when stressed, lost in the past or future. Keep your attention on the breathe for two minutes and focus on the air going in and out. This will calm your body down and bring your mind back into the present moment.
- Remember: There’s a day tomorrow too. When you have a bad day. Or life interferes with your plans, stress can kick in and get you down. In my experience the best way to handle such a situation is to tell yourself that there’s a day tomorrow. You can get it done then. Beating yourself up is not a helpful strategy.
Thanks for reading. Like or share if this helped you in anyway, so it can help others.
Rev J Martin