Never let the things you want, make you forget the things you have.
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How to Stay Positive: 11 Smart Habits
From I was very young, I have always been a happy person. Many people would make fun of me for smiling all the time.
As the famous saying goes, “Smile, it confuses people.”
Was I always happy? No. But my philosophy has always been, smile and the world smiles with you, cry, and you cry alone.
Often, I would get asked why are you so happy? And for the longest time, I did not have an answer.
I didn’t have an answer because I didn’t feel that happy, I had problems and things stressing me like everyone else.
When I focused on the reason why I was happy, I realised that it was down to me having a positive faith-filled view of life. No matter how bad things got, I always had a way of staying positive, even during tough times I knew things would get better.
In this blog post, I would like to share 11 of the most effective habits for staying positive that I have learned. I hope you get some inspiration.
1. Find an optimistic viewpoint in a negative situation
One of the simplest but most effective ways to build a more positive outlook is to look for the good in a situation.
When I am in a negative place, I like to ask myself questions like:
What is one thing that is positive or good about this situation?
Is there an opportunity within this situation?
When I look for the positive, I find that it takes my mind off my negative thoughts (that can quickly spiral out of control).
In the past I would ask the wrong questions. Questions like, how did I end up here? when will I ever learn? Why can’t I do anything right? The answers would only make things worse.
2. Cultivate and live in a positive environment
Your environment has a massive impact on how you feel — the people you choose to spend your time with effects your outlook on life. Also, the content you consume in the form of TV, internet, and media.
It’s essential to have influences in your life that support you and lift you instead of dragging you down.
So carefully consider what you let into your mind. You can, for example, ask yourself:
Who are the three most negative people I spend time with?
What are the 3 most negative sources of information I spend time on?
If you spend a lot of your time with people that complain and run others down, that negative energy will rub off on you.
My parents always told me to listen to the news and read the newspaper. I know it’s good to stay informed with what’s going on in the world, but if what you are hearing first thing in the morning is negativity, it can affect you for the rest of the day.
Instead, spend more time with friends and co-workers that are more positive, and encourage you to be better in some way. And, listen or read something positive first thing in the morning to set you up for the day.
3. Plan Your Day
I have found that when I don’t plan my day, I end up wasting a lot of time which results in me rushing around, stressed and frustrated, and things don’t go that well.
Negative thoughts start to build up, and I feel like my power decreases.
But if I plan my day I can think more clearly and get so much more achieved. Plus, it becomes easier to think things through and easier to find an optimistic and constructive perspective.
4. Don’t make a mountain out of a molehill
It’s easy to lose perspective, especially if you are stressed, and you are going too fast.
A small problem can become a terrifying one. To level the mountain, I do three things, so the problem doesn’t get out of hand:
First, say STOP. Realise you are in control, not your negative thinking.
Second, breathe. After you have disrupted the negative thoughts sit down and be still. Breathe with your belly and focus on just your in-breaths and out-breaths for a minute or two to calm your body and mind.
Thirdly, share by talking to someone close to you and getting a more grounded perspective on the situation by getting his or her input. Or ask yourself this: Will this matter in 5 years? Or even five weeks?
5. Don’t let vague fears hold you back from doing what you want
We all have things that we would like to do, like start a business, do a night class or ask someone out on a date.
A trap that a lot of people fall into is rather than follow through they fill their minds of what negative things could happen if they took the action
The mind fuelled by fear creates nightmare scenarios and plenty of self-doubts. I know. I have been there many times.
So, I have learned to ask myself this: honestly, what is the worst that could happen?
Over the years I have discovered that the worst thing that could realistically happen is not as scary as the nightmare my fear-fuelled mind will produce.
Finding clarity in this way doesn’t take much time or effort, and it can help you to avoid much mental suffering. And help you to step outside of your comfort zone and take that chance.
6. Add value and positivity to someone else’s life
What you send out you tend to get back. What you give to others and how you treat them is what you’ll get back. So, provide value and spread positivity.
Lend a hand to a neighbour that’s moving. Give a friend a ride in your car, or if they need information then help out by doing a little research for them.
Sometimes people don’t want any direct help. They want someone to listen or encourage them as they’ve had a bad day or are going through a tough time.
7. Exercise regularly and eat and sleep well
Exercise diet and sleep can seem very obvious, but you would be surprised how many people don’t look after themselves.
A good night’s sleep or good workout has a massive effect on me when my thoughts are pessimistic, and I have a lot of tension or stress.
And I know how much simpler it is to think clearly and faithfully when I’ve eaten healthy for a few days.
basic habits may sound boring, but they do have a considerable effect on your state of mind.
8. Learn to take criticism healthily
One of the most common fears is the fear of criticism. It can hold people back from doing what they want. A negative comment can extinguish your faith if you allow it.
A loved one may mean well, but don’t let their limiting beliefs become your destiny.
Whenever you step outside your comfort zone and do something new, criticism is pretty much unavoidable. So, the key is learning to handle it more healthily.
By doing so, your fear of it will lessen, and it will hurt less if you do get criticized. I usually use four steps when I get some criticism. Maybe they can help you too:
Step 1: Don’t reply right away.
When you are angry, upset or riled up then is time to calm down a bit before you reply. Take at least a couple of deep breaths or a little time to process the message before you respond.
Step 2: Listen to criticism.
Try to remain open and level-headed and figure out how this message can help you. Ask yourself: Is there one thing I can learn from this criticism? Is there something here that I may not want to hear but could help me?
Step 3: Remember that the criticism isn’t always about you.
Some criticism comes from people lashing out because they had a bad day. To lessen the sting of such criticism – I try to be understanding. I think to myself that this person might not be feeling so good at the moment.
Step 4: Reply or let go. No matter the method of criticism, for example an email, I try to keep my reply level-headed and kind. I may add a question or two to get more specific feedback that is helpful. And if they don’t reply or send another nasty message, then it is time to delete it and let that situation go.
9. Let It Out, Let It Go
Sometimes some criticism can hurt you even if you use the steps above.
Two things that have helped me with that challenge are: Let it out. Just talking it over with someone close can be very helpful to see it for what it is. Helping you find a healthier perspective on the situation.
Let it go. I have found over the years that the ability to let things go has helped me greatly. Some people never change; they will continue to hurt you and cause you stress. The solution, spend less time with them
10. Start your day in a positive way
How you start your day usually sets the tone. I once heard it said that the first hour is the rudder of the day.
So be careful about how you spend your mornings. If you get going at full speed, lost in future troubles of the day, then stress, and negative thoughts will ramp up quickly.
If you, on the other hand, start your day slowly, spending some time reading or listening to inspiring articles or podcasts, then that will make a big difference to how you approach your problems and difficulties.
11. Mindfully move through your day
When you spend your time in the present moment, then it becomes so much easier to access positive emotions.
When you get lost in the past or future, like so many of us, then worries become bigger. And failures and mistakes from the past can replay over and over in your mind dragging you into negativity.
A simple way to connect with the present moment is to take a walk-in nature, listen to the sounds of the world around you.
Another way to reconnect with the present moment is to pray and focus on each word. It might sound like a small and insignificant thing to do. But this reconnection with the present moment can have a very positive effect on the rest of your day.
Thanks for reading. Wishing you an amazing week.
Wisdom To Help You Through
It can be difficult when things are not going your way, but very often when you look back on difficult times you realise that it was through them times when you grew the most.
Looking back is the easy part, what makes someone wise is the ability to see the present through the eyes of experience.
Have a good day. Do not worry, everything works out in the end.
Inspiration of the Day
Even those closest to us that have our best interests at heart, still can hold us back. They can’t see how something could be possible. But it you can see it, then you can achieve it.
The only question is how badly do you want it.
Inspiration of the Day
Reflecting is always good, as you learn so many things. Things that you worried about that keep you up at night worked out ok in the end.
That 15 minute reading per day seemed so insignificant, but it turned out to be 15 books. Starting the evening class turned out to be the turning point in your career.
A year can completely change your life. Don’t worry, have faith, and follow your dreams.
7 Things You Should Give Up If You Want to Be Happy
Let’s face it; we all want to be happy. If you didn’t want to be happy you wouldn’t be reading this.
If you want to be happy you don’t need to add more things to your life — you need to give some up.
Here is a list of things that you need to give up to create more happiness in your life.
Give Up on Your Fears
We are born with only two innate fears: the fear of falling and the fear of loud sounds. All other fears we learn from our environment.
Some of us have a fear of snakes. Some of us have a fear of heights, others flying. We all have some kind of fear, but the fears that hold us back the most are the fears that stop is from doing what we want.
You want to change jobs, but fear of the uncertainty that brings keeps you where you are.
You want to attend the evening class, but the fear of what others will think stops you.
Unfortunately, fear and happiness can’t exist at the same time. So, fear becomes a problem.
The best way to give up your fears is to take small steps towards what you fear. If you fear to change jobs, it doesn’t stop you from doing out an up-to-date CV/Resume. It doesn’t stop you from looking for an available position or even applying. It doesn’t even stop you from attending the interview, as you can always decline if you get accepted.
Most people let fear stop them from even taking the first step, which could be as simple as making a phone call or sending an email.
When you take the first step to do the thing you fear you will start to believe that you can take the next step, and the next. Your faith grows, and you will be happier that you are moving towards the life you most desire.
Give Up on Your Negative Self-talk
I am my own worst critic. I have a constant conversation going on in my head telling me, “I will never be successful.” When I forget things, it tells me that, “I am such an idiot.”
Negative self-talk leads to poor self-confidence, low self-esteem, and a bad attitude.
Some of the most common forms of negative self-talk include:
• Filtering — when you increase the negative and decrease the positive things in your life.
• Personalising — when you blame yourself for things that go wrong.
• Polarizing — when you only see things as black and white.
• Catastrophizing — when you expect the worst in every situation.
If you want to be happy, you need to get rid of your negative self-talk. Pay attention to your negative self-talk and when you hear it….Stop!
Change your thinking and turn your negative thought into a positive. Change, “I will never be successful” to “I will find a way to make this work.”
“I can’t” to “I will learn.”
“It’s impossible” to “I will give it a try.”
You can change the way you talk about yourself. It will not happen overnight, it will take time, but you can do it. Like scratching a DVD over and over, eventually, the negative thoughts will no longer play.
Learn to be kind, gentle, and encouraging to yourself. Start by not saying anything to yourself that you wouldn’t say to your best friend. Example, If a friend had a chance for a promotion you wouldn’t tell them not to apply because they’ll probably not get it.
Give Up on Your Past
“Just because someone screwed up your past, it doesn’t mean you should give them permission to screw up your future.” — Zig Ziglar
We all have a past. It can be filled with good experiences, or it can be filled with negative experiences. If you don’t want your future to look like your past, you have to let go of the baggage that is holding you back.
You have to let go of the people who have held you back, or hurt you. Forgive them, and move on. Once you do that, a huge weight will lift off your shoulders; you will immediately feel lighter.
You will finally be able to let yourself be happy.
I know how hard it can be to let go of the past. Your past shaped who you are today. But remember, the people that hurt you would like nothing better than to know that their actions are still affecting you.
Let them go; they are not worth wasting your time and energy on any more.
Decide either to let the baggage of your past weigh you down or to let it go, so that you can be happy now.
Don’t forget that life is a journey, and not a destination. So, don’t carry the baggage of your past with you. Lighten your load and be a happier traveller.
When you look back, you will be glad that you did.
Give Up on Living Other People’s Dreams
“The two most important days in your life are the day you are born, and the day you find out why.” — Mark Twain
Too many people spend their lives living other people’s dreams. They are living the dreams of their parents, or the dreams of their friends, or the dreams of their social media following. Doing what others are doing.
They are so busy trying to live up to other people’s dreams, that they dismiss their dreams. Thinking they are insignificant.
If you don’t focus on your ambitions and dreams, then you will not be happy. You will never know what you want or need because you will be looking for direction from others.
You only have one life, and you must live it on your terms. Quit living other people’s dreams and find what makes you happy.
Give Up on Seeking the Approval of Others
We all want to be liked, but too many of us are living our lives based on the approval of others. We spend our lives trying to please others by living up to their expectations.
For most of my life I would try to impress others, but the older I got, the more I learnt. You will never please everyone, and even if you do it will not make you happy.
So, permit yourself to stop trying to please others. It doesn’t work.
Instead, focus on what makes you happy.
The second that you decide to be yourself, and to stop trying to please others, you will find that the right people will be drawn to you.
Give Up Comparing Yourself to Others
“No one can make you feel inferior without your consent.” — Eleanor Roosevelt
There will always be someone smarter, better looking, and more successful than you. Always. You can never win.
So, quit comparing yourself to others. It will not make you happy. Instead, focus on your strengths, the things that make you a remarkable individual.
The day you stop comparing yourself to others is the day that you will become much happier.
Give Up Negative People
You cannot expect to live a positive life if you spend time with negative people.They are the people that complain all the time, and run others down.
Negative people will manipulate you to get what they want. And if they don’t get it, they will get angry or upset at you.
You know who they are. Why are you spending time with them? Why are you allowing them to steal your happiness?
If you spend your time with negative and unhappy people, you will become negative and unhappy. If you spend your time with positive and happy people, you have a higher probability of becoming positive and happy. It’s not hard, but we like to make it so.
Happy people know that who they surround themselves with can mean the difference between a happy life and a miserable one.
Stop wasting your time with negative and unhappy people. Get rid of them. It may be difficult in the beginning, but you will be happy that you did.
Conclusion
We all get what we tolerate. So, stop tolerating excuses within yourself, stop tolerating limiting beliefs, or fearful states.
Happiness is a choice.
You are in control of your happiness. Every day you get to choose to be happy or not.
Quit making excuses. Quit blaming others. Quit blaming your circumstances. It’s time to take responsibility for your happiness.
You all have gifts and abilities, its time to share them with the world to make it a better place for all.
Enjoy your week.
Inspiration of the Day
The journey can seem hard, but anything worth getting never comes easy. Plus, anything attained with hardwork stays with you forever.
Take the weekend to rest your mind and body so you approach the coming week with energy and strenght.
What Would You Do With $86,400 A Day?
Its not hard to find people complaining. They will complain about standing in line, about the price of food, and what there goverment is doing or not doing.
It is much harder to find people that are actively working towards making a change. We all have 24 hours a day, and what we do in that 24 hours determines our destiny, and the destinies of those around us, so choose wisely.
Have a great day.
Killed By A Bus: When Knowing Your Future Doesn’t Help You
Once upon a time, a man went to a fortune teller, curious to know what she would say about his future.
The fortune teller looked into her crystal ball, and her facial expression said it all. She advised him that it would be better if he did not know but he insisted she told him.
She went on to tell him that he would die in a bus accident, and it would happen within the next two or three months. “Why? When? How?
“That I can not say,” she replied.
On the journey home, he was depressed and worried, telling himself how he had never really believed in fortune tellers.
After two months, the thought started to play on his mind every day. He became very anxious and wanted to make sure he avoided the prediction. So hired someone to run his business for a couple of months, as he decided a good plan would be to lock himself in his house where he wouldn’t come close to any buses.
Another three weeks past.
He got up one morning put the coffee on and went to feed his dog outside as usual. On the step his little son had left some of his toys, as he went to step over them he stepped on a little toy bus, fell and hit his head and died instantly.
This is a fictional story to illustrate an important message; sometimes we can be too careful, thinking that we can avoid the thing that we fear. We fear to be adventurous; we fear to do anything new; we fear to take a risk.
Most people think they’re not destined to do anything amazing, so they sit back in mediocrity. Tortured in later years with regret.
We all have a unique gift that we can use to enrich other peoples lives. Don’t let fear hold you back from fulfilling your destiny.
Live every day to the fullest. God rewards action, God rewards faith and often the biggest risk that you can take is to play it safe and not go after what you want.
So this week get out there, create your destiny, show God that there is no fear in your heart and watch the favour that flows into your life.
Thanks for reading. Like share comment to spread the message onto someone that maybe in the need of some encouragement.
Inspiration of the Day
We can’t all like the jobs that we do, but in our days off we have a chance to learn, evolve, and grow.
Now with sources like YouTube, Udemy, Masterclass series, there is countless ways to learn a new skill online.
Platforms like Facebook, Instagram, Redbubble, Society 6 allow you to connect with millions of people, sharing your work, so if you are an artist, designer, writer, musician, dancer there are plenty of ways to connect with people.
Looking at the media the world can seem a dark, scary place but on the flip side of that we are living in the best time in human history.
Embrace your gifts this weekend and share it with the world.
Live Today With Faith 